Silence, listening, looking

Dear Blog,

   Oh man. I have ignored you for so long. Why? Well.. I've been wondering that myself lately. I guess its because I have't had much to say.
I've changed a lot since the last time I posted something on here. A lot in my life has changed, and thats ok! It took me a long time to accept that change, and be ok with it. Hence, why I have not written.
   My house is oh so silent today, and that silence gets my brain thinking. Thinking about life, my goals, my expectations for me and those around me, life, boys, life, friends, future. My brain is just racked with thoughts. It's over whelming sometimes.

  Then I remember. Oh how I remember to stop, take a deep breath and look up. The silence of my home, lets me listen.

Listen deeply.
He hears me.

   He listens to all those thoughts running through me. And he cares. He knows how it makes me feel. He knows the heartache I feel and he loves me, he understands when even I have a hard time gaining that understanding.
In Alma 22-26 we were talking about how they buried their swords and weapons of war. I was asked a question that I pondered for a long time. What is a weapon I need to burry deep? I thought hard about this. I decided my weapon I need to burry deep down in the ground is my lack of faith.
Faith is one of my biggest struggles. Not lack of love or caring. Its faith. Faith that he does in fact hear my prayers and hear the pleadings of my heart.

   When life gets tough, its important to remember. Remember who we are. Where we came from. Where we are going. And how to get through the time in between. Pray. Read. Listen. Be worthy. This is how we gain faith, we trust in that faith and make it through. I love him. I love him with all my heart and soul and I trust in his plan for me. His plan for me has never been the same as my plan. Sometimes that bring me great joy! Other times it tries my faith. Don't give up. Its easy to fall and hard to get up sometimes. But look up, because he is there to lift you. As he does for me :)
I love you, and I will try to keep blogging more often!

“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow.” 
― Mary Anne Radmacher

I can do hard things

Dear blog, 
Guess what! Its that time of year again when things are kinda tough, change is in the air. 
   

   This weekend I had a chance to go on my final date with my dear Stewy before he leaves on a mission. We went down town to go walk around temple square. We went to dinner at The GardenI. It was delicious! (Try their fried pickles, seriously, yum!!) Then possibly my favorite part of the date we went to the Joseph Smith movie at the legacy theater. Never have I felt Emma's example impact me so much. 
   I know these next couple years are going to be so tough without my best friend by myself to listen to everything I have to say, good, bad, funny, literally everything. Emma conquered so many hard and difficult things in her lifetime, I can't even imagine the heart ache and pain she felt and over-came. I realized then and there I was very capable of doing hard things. Faith is what kept Emma going and serving everyone around her. That faith is what I crave, that service is what I hope to achieve. 
  After the movie, Stewy and I went and found a nice spot to just look at the temple and talk about the future. The future of service that lay in front of us, that sacrifice both of us are willing and grateful to make, as hard as it may be. If Emma did it, I can do it. 

  God is testing me, because he wants me to grow. I may not always understand why he asks me to do the things he does, and I won't lie trusting him and not knowing why, is difficult, but ever so worth it! 
   In seminary today we talked about 1 Nephi 6:4-6 and 1 Nephi 9. Something new I learned today was that Nephi was so faithful. He was asked to keep two records, he said in 9:5, "Wherefore, the Lord hath commanded me to make these plates for a wise purpose in him, which purpose I know not."
   We don't always have to know God's purpose, we just have to know God has a purpose. Why? "But the Lord knoweth all things from the beginning, wherefore, he prepareth a way to accomplish all his works among the children of men; for behold, he hath all power unto the fulfilling of all his words. And this it is. Amen" (verse 6)

  This gospel is so perfect and real. It brings me lasting true happiness, God knows all things, he has a beautiful perfect plan. Learn to come to his plan, his will and you will grow and become like Him and His Son :)
   Know that we, you and I, can do hard things, through Christ! 

#usetheinternetforgood #shareit

-Whitney 
(Watch this video on the new church website to help prepare missionaries!) 

I can't express enough gratitude for the positive feedback I have heard so far! Thanks for all your support! Spread the thanks today, thank someone you normally wouldn't :)

(Interested in the app that I made these beautiful clips with? shoot me an email!)